It seems like every few weeks, there’s a new trend that sweeps the fashion and beauty communities. While girls may think these trends are the next best thing since sliced bread, many guys actually hate many of the styles that’ve become popular in recent years. Here are a few of the girl trends that most guys hate.
1. High Waisted Jorts
High Wasited Jorts – first on the list, and probably one of the most universally hated by men. Who even started this trend? No, really – I want their full name and last known address. As a devout “ass man” and self-proclaimed booty connoisseur, I want to find this person, drive them out to a secluded location, make them dig a deep hole, fill it with Jorts, & bury them alive in it. I can’t even imagine the thought process which leads some women to think “hm, let me take my perfectly sculpted ass, this booty which I’ve worked at for years with hours of squats and ‘fat burning wheat grass juice cleanses’ – and i’ll make them look like two chicken cutlets sticking out of a broken denim shopping bag “. Nobody looks good in high wasted jean shorts. Nobody. Even the sexiest super models on the planet look just OK in them. I can guarantee you almost any guy would prefer to see your love handles than the Jorts you’re trying to hide them with.
2.High Waisted Bathing Suit
“That’s a bathing suit? Why would you wear jeans in the ocean? What do those buttons go to? Is that a pull-up or two pieces like a diaper?”
“If you’re covering up your midsection because it’s indecent, I’m pretty sure that amount of cleavage isn’t supporting your case.”
“Why are girls so obsessed with covering their belly button? Show off what your umbilical cord gave you!”
Seriously though, f*** rompers. No guy on the planet likes see women wearing a romper. Ok, maybe that’s an exaggeration – there’s probably one guy who likes rompers, but he almost definitely wears a fedora and thinks whipping out his acoustic guitar at parties & singing the first 2 verses of Wonderwall is going to get him laid. Knowing what I know now about rompers, I actually get angry at the fact that these even exist. They destroy your curves, ruin your ass, and give the overall impression of a toddler on an Easter-Egg hunt (probably because they were actually invented for toddlers in the first place). “But I have this one really cute romper that I look AMAZING in”. Sorry, but no, no you don’t.
The worst part about rompers – not only are they hideous, they’re completely impractical. I once asked a girl friend out of curiosity about how women even go to the bathroom while wearing one (I had assumed there was always some hidden zipper or something) – I was completely floored to learn that you either have to “just pull it to the side”, or “get completely naked in the stall”. Wait, what in the actual f*** is that!? Why did we decide to go back 2 centuries in clothing technology & make the Mormon “magic underwear” look a thing? And how the hell did this become go-to summer music festival fashion?? Now every time I’m with an otherwise attractive girl at a festival who happens to be wearing a romper, whenever she goes to the bathroom, I have to imagine her getting fully undressed in a disgusting porta potty that has shit & urine smeared across every surface. I don’t even want to come within 3 feet of you after that, let alone make out with you.
“Oh, but I just pull it to the side”. Awesome; I used to always wonder who are the guys with such terrible aim that they spray piss all over toilet seats. Now I know, it’s not the guys doing it at all, its girls wearing rompers attempting the side-pull & hover technique, who get their crotch fabric caught in the stream. P.S. They look better on the toddler!
4.Cat Eye Eyeliner
“This isn’t Egypt, you’re not a d*mn cat, you’re not going to fly anywhere with those stupid overdone eyelashes. Calm it the f*ck down.”
“It’s eyeliner bro” — “Oh I thought it was those fake eyelashes”
This is one of the most retarded fashion trends that trendy girls wear because they are simply brainwashed into thinking they look cute, when in reality they look stupid. They are also ridiculously expensive for something that doesn’t look that special. These little brown boot things that allow people to drag their feet all lazy-like while looking far away from sexy as they could possibly be, is generally why men do not like this trend.
“That top you wore last weekend, the black one. Looks like maternity wear.”
“Peplums… I just don’t get it.”
Acrylic nails basically scream ghetto-bitches-nails. While guys may love that long natural nails great for back-scratching, they make some feel like they are dating Cruella. Big fake press-on reminds men of claws, and men don’t want to get clawed, ever.
Like Uggs, harem pants are popular among women because they’re trendy and extremely comfortable. The pants are baggy around the seat, and thighs and become tighter from the knee down, giving the wearer a unique silhouette. A classic black pair like the ones above are perfect for a comfy day at the office, and more colorful or patterned pants can be worn for a relaxing day out.
Men don’t find the pants’ unconventional shape flattering, however. At best, guys bemoan the way these pants do nothing for a lady’s rear end, and at worst, they compare this look to a full diaper. Don’t send these pants to the thrift store just because of the male mindset, but you might want to skip over them when choosing an outfit for a first date!
8.Cut Out Wedges
“There are some triangles, and based on what I know from all of the architecture video games I played — I played one. That screams it’s supportive, structurally, but I don’t know who the f*ck would be supportive of anybody wearing these.”
“You know what would be even more supportive? It being solid like a wedge normally is, or a flat footed shoe like people normally wear.”
“If you’re under the age of 10 you can get away with it. After that, you’re just living in denial. That’s stupid.”
“I hate how girls wear those knit hats on the top of their heads… it’s clearly not even for warmth… and it looks dumb… always very neon-colored.”
“There’s this look I would call ‘the bourgeoise bohemian” that involves those floppy felt hats. This look is played out.”
“Shirts that reveal the sides of their bodies showing their bra… do you know what I mean?”
“Overlarge sweaters — seriously, get out of the ‘80s.”